I was missing Elder Scott a little during Conference this past weekend. I listened to one of his talks this morning. In it, he says, "Why does the Lord want us to pray to Him and to ask? Because that is how revelation is received." That got me thinking a bit.
Two of my closest friends - other than Doug, I would say they are my best friends - rarely call me. It is always me that needs to initiate contact. And, usually, when I do call them, it isn't for me to be able to talk but is because I want to get their take on something or find out what is going on with them. They almost always say something that "fills my cup." If I don't reach out to them, I don't receive that boost, that "revelation" to help along my way.
In this metaphor, I'm not saying that Heavenly Father doesn't ever "call" us. Of course he does when there is a message that we need. (Now, do we answer the phone? That's a whole different conversation.) But, it is in our reaching out to him - putting some effort into it - that we get the extreme blessing of being able to get his take on things in our life.
As an aside, lately LJ has been talking about how he doesn't necessarily need to pray about what he grateful for because "Heavenly Father already knows." I just thought of this so will have to bring it up - as parents, we know our kids are grateful for many things in our day to day life. For example, we know they are grateful for dinner (at least if it is pizza or chicken nuggets and does not include a vegetable). But, more than knowing, doesn't it mean a bit more when they actually say, "Thank you for dinner."
Showing posts with label Conference Talks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Conference Talks. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 4, 2016
Sunday, July 10, 2016
Prioritizing the Family
A few weeks ago, I was asked to speak in church on The Family: A Proclamation to the World and The Living Christ. I knew this would be a daunting task and I didn't have much time to prepare my talk. I prayed for the Holy Ghost to help guide me in what to say as well as to help those listening to hear the message they needed to hear. I felt that guidance as I gathered my thoughts - and the talk ended up going a completely different direction than I had thought it would. I knew that I did not want it to be a political talk and I hope that it doesn't come across that way. I also knew that I wanted to include those of different circumstances as part of the applicable audience. A number of people have asked for it and/or the references used and so I thought I would include it here for their sake - as well as for my boys.
These two documents are anchors in the stormy seas of life. The doctrines taught are so very important in the world in which we live. They are interconnected. An attack on the doctrine of one is an attack on the other.
Sister Beck – “Anti-Christ is antifamily. Any doctrine or principle [we] hear from the world that is antifamily is also anti-Christ. It’s that clear.”
As I prepared the talk, I was struck by strong voices of warning, direction and encouragement regarding the family in society.
1. "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" states a warning itself. "Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets." Adding to this, Elder Bruce D. Porter said “So vital is the family to the cycle of human life and the renewal of each generation that it is fair to say that if the family breaks down, everything breaks down. If families do not fulfill their divinely appointed purpose of carrying on the light of truth and the torch of civilization to the next generation, then we can throw any amount of money or ideas or programs at our world’s problems, and we will assuredly fail.”
2. Sister Oscarson - When President Gordon B. Hinckley first read “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” 20 years ago this year, we were grateful for and valued the clarity, simplicity, and truth of this revelatory document. Little did we realize then how very desperately we would need these basic declarations in today’s world as the criteria by which we could judge each new wind of worldly dogma coming at us from the media, the Internet, scholars, TV and films, and even legislators. The proclamation on the family has become our benchmark for judging the philosophies of the world, and I testify that the principles set forth within this statement are as true today as they were when they were given to us by a prophet of God nearly 20 years ago.
3. Sister Beck - “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” was written to reinforce that the family is central to the Creator’s plan. Without the family, there is no plan; there is no reason for mortal life. We must be very clear on key points of doctrine, which we find in “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” This generation will be called upon to defend the doctrine of the family as never before. If they don’t know it, they can’t defend it. President Kimball said: “Many of the social restraints which in the past have helped to reinforce and to shore up the family are dissolving and disappearing. The time will come when only those who believe deeply and actively in the family will be able to preserve their families in the midst of the gathering evil around us. …”
Think about the word "actively.” What can we do to believe actively in the family?
Last August, I had surgery on my knee and was laid up for quite a while. I kept myself occupied by doing indexing. There was a common occupation listed that stuck out to me - "Homemaker." I like to think about the etymology of words began thinking of it more as a "maker of the home" and what an important job that is. I discovered a quote from Sister Oscarson that went right along with what I had been thinking.
Sister Oscarson - We need to stand and defend the sanctity of the home. We need to take a term which is sometimes spoken of with derision and elevate it. It is the term homemaker. All of us—women, men, youth, and children, single or married—can work at being homemakers. We should “make our homes” places of order, refuge, holiness, and safety. Our homes should be places where the Spirit of the Lord is felt in rich abundance and where the scriptures and the gospel are studied, taught, and lived. What a difference it would make in the world if all people would see themselves as makers of righteous homes. Let us defend the home as a place which is second only to the temple in holiness.
When I first met Doug's parents, I was talking to Doug's dad about being a convert to the church. He said, that one of the things that really stuck out to him was the feelings he had as he entered his (future) in-laws house for the first time. He talked about how the Spirit filled their home in abundance due to the way that they lived their lives. He created a goal to have a similar feeling when people enter his home. He, (and my mother-in-law), have definitely succeeded in accomplishing that goal. Every time we enter their home, (and even their driveway), it feels like going to a spiritual refuge. It is a welcome place and a place to refuel. We strive to similarly invite the Spirit into our home. It is pertinent, for not only ourselves but also for our children, that we do this.
Sister Beck - Never at any time in the history of the world have we needed stronger families and stronger homes. It is out of those homes and families that the next generation comes. As each of us walks out of our own home every day, how strong is that home that we are leaving? Is it a bastion of strength and power for us?
We need to prioritize our families. How many other items do we have to prioritize? Soccer? Robotics? Church callings? Swimming? Meal Planning? School? Science Fair? Speech? It can be difficult to balance everything. With our current work schedules and church callings, we are able to average about 1 meal/day together throughout the week, (and some weeks only 4 meals per week). Some days we don't get to have any meals all together as a family. It is difficult and we have definitely been able to feel the added stress to not having that family time together on those days. President Uchtdorf gives us wise counsel to keep our priorities in line.
1. President Uchtdorf - “One example of great importance for humanity is strengthening our own families. The principle of family home evening was given to us in 1915. President McKay reminded parents again in 1964 that ‘no other success can compensate for failure in the home.’ In 1995 the prophets of our day called upon all the world to strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society. . . . However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.”
2. Elder Holland - No one would wish a bad marriage on anyone. But where do we think “good marriages” come from? They don’t spring full-blown from the head of Zeus any more than does a good education, or good home teaching, or a good symphony. Why should a marriage require fewer tears and less toil and shabbier commitment than your job or your clothes or your car? Yet some of you will spend less time on the quality and substance and purpose of your marriage—the highest, holiest, culminating covenant you make in this world—than you will in maintaining your ’72 Datsun.
3. Sister Oscarson - We eagerly teach our children to aim high in this life. We want to make sure that our children know that they have the potential to achieve and be whatever they can imagine. We hope they will love learning, be educated, and talented. Do we also teach our sons and daughters there is no greater honor, no more elevated title, and no more important role in this life than that of mother or father? I would hope that as we encourage our children to reach for the very best in this life that we also teach them to honor and exalt the roles that mothers and fathers play in Heavenly Father’s plan.
Recently, I was talking to a good friend about what we were like at 19. She got married at 19 and I was nowhere near even thinking about getting married at 19. At the time, I figured my mid-20's would be a good time to start considering marriage. I needed to finish medical school first. I didn't have much interest in having children. A few years later, I received my Patriarchal blessing - I knew I was going to have children. (Yes, plural.) It still scared me a lot but the idea grew on me. Then, as a missionary, I met a family that had two little girls, Jasmine and Madeline. I loved these girls so much and they seemed to genuinely like me too. Playing with them made me realize that I really wanted to have kids. I wanted to feel that direct-from-heaven feeling that you can only have when a child hugs you and puts their head under your chin. I have a picture of Jasmine and Madeline with their mom hanging in my house and every time I see it, I think, "Yes...that's when I decided I wanted to have kids." I absolutely love being a mom. I didn't really think I would - that whole selfish, only child thing coming out. It is by far the hardest thing I have ever done but the rewards are more than any other glory or honor I could receive. I definitely feel that I learn more than I teach as a parent.
I don't know if parenting comes naturally to anyone but it most definitely did not come naturally to me. I desperately require heavenly help in parenting. It is among the many motivators to live my life in such a way to have the Spirit with me. In a talk from Women's Conference in 2010 Sister Beck explains how to do this. I've heard her reiterate these concepts, (along with the shift-work example of parenting and how you can't be "on the clock" for all three shifts mentioned in this talk), numerous times and they always get me thinking, "I need to figure that out!"
Sister Beck – I asked myself what things must be taken care of, and if I don’t take care of them, the blessings of eternal life won’t be mine nor will they be my family’s. I wrote at the top of the list revelation. I have to be able to know the mind and will of God. Therefore, I have to do the things in my life that put me in a position to hear His voice… It takes personal revelation every day to help us prioritize and reprioritize and keep at bay the influences of the world that would draw us from what we are to do. I have taken a paper and pencil with me most of the time since then to my prayers. I don’t always receive an answer or instruction, but I am ready. I want to be ready to learn what the Lord would have me do in my day. Who needs my help? How can I increase my faith this day? How can I strengthen my family? What things do I need to correct in order to be worthy to receive His Spirit? He will tell me.
For our family, one of the more recent times that we needed some divine direction was when Doug was considering going back to school. We thought it seemed like a good idea but knew we would need heaven's help to get through the 4 year doctorate program. We decided to go to the temple and see if we received any answers. We met up in the Celestial Room to discuss any inspiration we felt. Doug felt good about the school decision. I had a bit of a different answer - I promised that the question I was thinking of was about him going to school but the answer that I received was that we should have a baby. We moved forward with both even though it wouldn't be easy. The Lion was born the day before Doug's Organic Chemistry final a little over 9 months later. I learned a few important lessons during this process.
First, I learned that the Lord loves us and will make sure we are okay. We had a number of obstacles over the last 3 years. (1 year left to go.) At first, Doug was trying to do some pre-requisite classes while still working full time which forced him into working a graveyard shift and then having class 20 miles away during the day and a toddler and newborn at home. As he started the doctorate program, he quit his job and I went back to work part-time. Working full-time has been tempting, in an attempt to decrease the financial stress, but it has never felt right or worked out the way we would need it to in regards to scheduling. I have changed jobs a few times during the years - some would say too many times - but each time, we have felt directed to do so. We have been guided and directed in each of these decisions and comforted when "our plan" didn't align with His plan. This was one of my favorite moments to look back on and remember that we have someone looking out for us. I cherish that moment of receiving the answer of, "Anne, I love you and I believe in you. I know you are frustrated and it doesn't seem to make sense to you that the change did not occur. Please know that there is a reason. I need you to remain in your current situation - not for you but for those around you. You can be a force for good in their lives. Will you please sacrifice your plan a bit longer so that I can use you for that purpose?..." Revelation has been received, doors have been opened, obstacles have been overcome, financial struggles have miraculously worked themselves out. We have learned much of how much the Lord loves us and wants our family to succeed in every conceivable way.
The second greatest thing that I have learned through this experience is just how amazing my husband is. Remember all those talks and quotes above that talk about prioritizing family? Yes, he does all of those things. And, all the things on this list? Yep, he does all of those things too. He sacrifices so much in order to make sure the boys know they are his priority. He will spend the afternoon and evening playing with them, and then make up the study time by staying up way past midnight, only to get up early and help get breakfast and lunches made. I would not have made it through these 3 years without his help and his dedication to us.
At the Vatican Summit on Marriage, President Eyring gave us some hope that happy marriages and families are attainable if we stick to it.
President Eyring - [The doctrines and counsel in the Family Proclamation are] things people must do for us to have a renaissance of happy marriages and productive families...Such a renaissance will require people to try for the ideal—and to keep trying even when the happy result is slow to come and when loud voices mock the effort. As we work to build and encourage faithful, loving marriages in which men and women become as one and nurture their families, the Lord will multiply your efforts. As we join together in this work, I promise progress toward that happy result.
A promise like that can definitely give you a boost during those, "Is it worth it?" moments.
When the early saints were asked to do the (seemingly) impossible in building the Salt Lake Temple, Elder Holland explained what all was required...and why it was required. While reading this quote think of the idea of creating a stable, successful and happy family. It can be a daunting task, but is there any greater work to be done?
Elder Holland – Blood, toil, tears, and sweat. The best things are always worth finishing. “Know ye not that ye are the temple of God?” (1 Corinthians 3:16). Most assuredly you are. As long and laborious as the effort may seem, please keep shaping and setting the stones that will make your accomplishment “a grand and imposing spectacle.” Take advantage of every opportunity to learn and grow. Dream dreams and see visions. Work toward their realization. Wait patiently when you have no other choice. Lean on your sword and rest a while, but get up and fight again. Perhaps you will not see the full meaning of your effort in your own lifetime. But your children will, or your children’s children will.
I am grateful for all of the examples I have in my life of those that prioritize the family. I am grateful for the many testimonies and talks on the topic that can direct, encourage and support us in our efforts. I know that there is a reason that this topic is mentioned again and again and again. With the instability in the world and society, (as further evidenced by recent events this week), it is pertinent that we are able to provide a stable foundation for our families - no matter what stage of life you are in. I know that we will be blessed and guided in our efforts.
These two documents are anchors in the stormy seas of life. The doctrines taught are so very important in the world in which we live. They are interconnected. An attack on the doctrine of one is an attack on the other.
Sister Beck – “Anti-Christ is antifamily. Any doctrine or principle [we] hear from the world that is antifamily is also anti-Christ. It’s that clear.”
As I prepared the talk, I was struck by strong voices of warning, direction and encouragement regarding the family in society.
1. "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" states a warning itself. "Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets." Adding to this, Elder Bruce D. Porter said “So vital is the family to the cycle of human life and the renewal of each generation that it is fair to say that if the family breaks down, everything breaks down. If families do not fulfill their divinely appointed purpose of carrying on the light of truth and the torch of civilization to the next generation, then we can throw any amount of money or ideas or programs at our world’s problems, and we will assuredly fail.”
2. Sister Oscarson - When President Gordon B. Hinckley first read “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” 20 years ago this year, we were grateful for and valued the clarity, simplicity, and truth of this revelatory document. Little did we realize then how very desperately we would need these basic declarations in today’s world as the criteria by which we could judge each new wind of worldly dogma coming at us from the media, the Internet, scholars, TV and films, and even legislators. The proclamation on the family has become our benchmark for judging the philosophies of the world, and I testify that the principles set forth within this statement are as true today as they were when they were given to us by a prophet of God nearly 20 years ago.
3. Sister Beck - “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” was written to reinforce that the family is central to the Creator’s plan. Without the family, there is no plan; there is no reason for mortal life. We must be very clear on key points of doctrine, which we find in “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” This generation will be called upon to defend the doctrine of the family as never before. If they don’t know it, they can’t defend it. President Kimball said: “Many of the social restraints which in the past have helped to reinforce and to shore up the family are dissolving and disappearing. The time will come when only those who believe deeply and actively in the family will be able to preserve their families in the midst of the gathering evil around us. …”
Think about the word "actively.” What can we do to believe actively in the family?
Last August, I had surgery on my knee and was laid up for quite a while. I kept myself occupied by doing indexing. There was a common occupation listed that stuck out to me - "Homemaker." I like to think about the etymology of words began thinking of it more as a "maker of the home" and what an important job that is. I discovered a quote from Sister Oscarson that went right along with what I had been thinking.
Sister Oscarson - We need to stand and defend the sanctity of the home. We need to take a term which is sometimes spoken of with derision and elevate it. It is the term homemaker. All of us—women, men, youth, and children, single or married—can work at being homemakers. We should “make our homes” places of order, refuge, holiness, and safety. Our homes should be places where the Spirit of the Lord is felt in rich abundance and where the scriptures and the gospel are studied, taught, and lived. What a difference it would make in the world if all people would see themselves as makers of righteous homes. Let us defend the home as a place which is second only to the temple in holiness.
When I first met Doug's parents, I was talking to Doug's dad about being a convert to the church. He said, that one of the things that really stuck out to him was the feelings he had as he entered his (future) in-laws house for the first time. He talked about how the Spirit filled their home in abundance due to the way that they lived their lives. He created a goal to have a similar feeling when people enter his home. He, (and my mother-in-law), have definitely succeeded in accomplishing that goal. Every time we enter their home, (and even their driveway), it feels like going to a spiritual refuge. It is a welcome place and a place to refuel. We strive to similarly invite the Spirit into our home. It is pertinent, for not only ourselves but also for our children, that we do this.
Sister Beck - Never at any time in the history of the world have we needed stronger families and stronger homes. It is out of those homes and families that the next generation comes. As each of us walks out of our own home every day, how strong is that home that we are leaving? Is it a bastion of strength and power for us?
We need to prioritize our families. How many other items do we have to prioritize? Soccer? Robotics? Church callings? Swimming? Meal Planning? School? Science Fair? Speech? It can be difficult to balance everything. With our current work schedules and church callings, we are able to average about 1 meal/day together throughout the week, (and some weeks only 4 meals per week). Some days we don't get to have any meals all together as a family. It is difficult and we have definitely been able to feel the added stress to not having that family time together on those days. President Uchtdorf gives us wise counsel to keep our priorities in line.
1. President Uchtdorf - “One example of great importance for humanity is strengthening our own families. The principle of family home evening was given to us in 1915. President McKay reminded parents again in 1964 that ‘no other success can compensate for failure in the home.’ In 1995 the prophets of our day called upon all the world to strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society. . . . However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform.”
2. Elder Holland - No one would wish a bad marriage on anyone. But where do we think “good marriages” come from? They don’t spring full-blown from the head of Zeus any more than does a good education, or good home teaching, or a good symphony. Why should a marriage require fewer tears and less toil and shabbier commitment than your job or your clothes or your car? Yet some of you will spend less time on the quality and substance and purpose of your marriage—the highest, holiest, culminating covenant you make in this world—than you will in maintaining your ’72 Datsun.
3. Sister Oscarson - We eagerly teach our children to aim high in this life. We want to make sure that our children know that they have the potential to achieve and be whatever they can imagine. We hope they will love learning, be educated, and talented. Do we also teach our sons and daughters there is no greater honor, no more elevated title, and no more important role in this life than that of mother or father? I would hope that as we encourage our children to reach for the very best in this life that we also teach them to honor and exalt the roles that mothers and fathers play in Heavenly Father’s plan.
Recently, I was talking to a good friend about what we were like at 19. She got married at 19 and I was nowhere near even thinking about getting married at 19. At the time, I figured my mid-20's would be a good time to start considering marriage. I needed to finish medical school first. I didn't have much interest in having children. A few years later, I received my Patriarchal blessing - I knew I was going to have children. (Yes, plural.) It still scared me a lot but the idea grew on me. Then, as a missionary, I met a family that had two little girls, Jasmine and Madeline. I loved these girls so much and they seemed to genuinely like me too. Playing with them made me realize that I really wanted to have kids. I wanted to feel that direct-from-heaven feeling that you can only have when a child hugs you and puts their head under your chin. I have a picture of Jasmine and Madeline with their mom hanging in my house and every time I see it, I think, "Yes...that's when I decided I wanted to have kids." I absolutely love being a mom. I didn't really think I would - that whole selfish, only child thing coming out. It is by far the hardest thing I have ever done but the rewards are more than any other glory or honor I could receive. I definitely feel that I learn more than I teach as a parent.
I don't know if parenting comes naturally to anyone but it most definitely did not come naturally to me. I desperately require heavenly help in parenting. It is among the many motivators to live my life in such a way to have the Spirit with me. In a talk from Women's Conference in 2010 Sister Beck explains how to do this. I've heard her reiterate these concepts, (along with the shift-work example of parenting and how you can't be "on the clock" for all three shifts mentioned in this talk), numerous times and they always get me thinking, "I need to figure that out!"
Sister Beck – I asked myself what things must be taken care of, and if I don’t take care of them, the blessings of eternal life won’t be mine nor will they be my family’s. I wrote at the top of the list revelation. I have to be able to know the mind and will of God. Therefore, I have to do the things in my life that put me in a position to hear His voice… It takes personal revelation every day to help us prioritize and reprioritize and keep at bay the influences of the world that would draw us from what we are to do. I have taken a paper and pencil with me most of the time since then to my prayers. I don’t always receive an answer or instruction, but I am ready. I want to be ready to learn what the Lord would have me do in my day. Who needs my help? How can I increase my faith this day? How can I strengthen my family? What things do I need to correct in order to be worthy to receive His Spirit? He will tell me.
For our family, one of the more recent times that we needed some divine direction was when Doug was considering going back to school. We thought it seemed like a good idea but knew we would need heaven's help to get through the 4 year doctorate program. We decided to go to the temple and see if we received any answers. We met up in the Celestial Room to discuss any inspiration we felt. Doug felt good about the school decision. I had a bit of a different answer - I promised that the question I was thinking of was about him going to school but the answer that I received was that we should have a baby. We moved forward with both even though it wouldn't be easy. The Lion was born the day before Doug's Organic Chemistry final a little over 9 months later. I learned a few important lessons during this process.
First, I learned that the Lord loves us and will make sure we are okay. We had a number of obstacles over the last 3 years. (1 year left to go.) At first, Doug was trying to do some pre-requisite classes while still working full time which forced him into working a graveyard shift and then having class 20 miles away during the day and a toddler and newborn at home. As he started the doctorate program, he quit his job and I went back to work part-time. Working full-time has been tempting, in an attempt to decrease the financial stress, but it has never felt right or worked out the way we would need it to in regards to scheduling. I have changed jobs a few times during the years - some would say too many times - but each time, we have felt directed to do so. We have been guided and directed in each of these decisions and comforted when "our plan" didn't align with His plan. This was one of my favorite moments to look back on and remember that we have someone looking out for us. I cherish that moment of receiving the answer of, "Anne, I love you and I believe in you. I know you are frustrated and it doesn't seem to make sense to you that the change did not occur. Please know that there is a reason. I need you to remain in your current situation - not for you but for those around you. You can be a force for good in their lives. Will you please sacrifice your plan a bit longer so that I can use you for that purpose?..." Revelation has been received, doors have been opened, obstacles have been overcome, financial struggles have miraculously worked themselves out. We have learned much of how much the Lord loves us and wants our family to succeed in every conceivable way.
The second greatest thing that I have learned through this experience is just how amazing my husband is. Remember all those talks and quotes above that talk about prioritizing family? Yes, he does all of those things. And, all the things on this list? Yep, he does all of those things too. He sacrifices so much in order to make sure the boys know they are his priority. He will spend the afternoon and evening playing with them, and then make up the study time by staying up way past midnight, only to get up early and help get breakfast and lunches made. I would not have made it through these 3 years without his help and his dedication to us.
At the Vatican Summit on Marriage, President Eyring gave us some hope that happy marriages and families are attainable if we stick to it.
President Eyring - [The doctrines and counsel in the Family Proclamation are] things people must do for us to have a renaissance of happy marriages and productive families...Such a renaissance will require people to try for the ideal—and to keep trying even when the happy result is slow to come and when loud voices mock the effort. As we work to build and encourage faithful, loving marriages in which men and women become as one and nurture their families, the Lord will multiply your efforts. As we join together in this work, I promise progress toward that happy result.
A promise like that can definitely give you a boost during those, "Is it worth it?" moments.
When the early saints were asked to do the (seemingly) impossible in building the Salt Lake Temple, Elder Holland explained what all was required...and why it was required. While reading this quote think of the idea of creating a stable, successful and happy family. It can be a daunting task, but is there any greater work to be done?
Elder Holland – Blood, toil, tears, and sweat. The best things are always worth finishing. “Know ye not that ye are the temple of God?” (1 Corinthians 3:16). Most assuredly you are. As long and laborious as the effort may seem, please keep shaping and setting the stones that will make your accomplishment “a grand and imposing spectacle.” Take advantage of every opportunity to learn and grow. Dream dreams and see visions. Work toward their realization. Wait patiently when you have no other choice. Lean on your sword and rest a while, but get up and fight again. Perhaps you will not see the full meaning of your effort in your own lifetime. But your children will, or your children’s children will.
I am grateful for all of the examples I have in my life of those that prioritize the family. I am grateful for the many testimonies and talks on the topic that can direct, encourage and support us in our efforts. I know that there is a reason that this topic is mentioned again and again and again. With the instability in the world and society, (as further evidenced by recent events this week), it is pertinent that we are able to provide a stable foundation for our families - no matter what stage of life you are in. I know that we will be blessed and guided in our efforts.
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
Conference Answers
A couple of weeks ago, we heard one of my favorite songs from Scripture Scouts. It is about imagining Christ as a child and his interactions with nature. (You can listen to a clip of it here.) I had heard it over and over again and never really paid attention. Then, one day I listened to the lyrics and since then, I feel a little wave of the Holy Ghost almost every time. I have mentioned to LJ previously about how I was able to the feel the Holy Ghost when I heard that song. When we heard it a couple of weeks ago, he asked, "Do you feel the Spirit when you hear this song?" I said that I did and I asked if he did. He dejectedly said, "I don't ever feel it. I don't know how." My heart broke for him a little bit and I tried to explain that he has probably felt the Holy Ghost but just not been able to recognize it. I explained that it isn't usually a big feeling but just loving thoughts and feeling happy and good. That didn't seem to completely satisfy him and so we decided that, with General Conference coming up a couple of days later, we would pray for answers during General Conference. I helped remind him to pray for that during his prayers. (Random tangent - last night, he was helping The Lion with his prayers and included, "Thank you for the millions of aliens." What?!? Back to the more reverent thoughts...) I pleaded with my Heavenly Father to help answer my boy's prayer and that he will learn to recognize and follow the promptings of the Holy Ghost.
As conference weekend arrived, we headed to Twin Falls to be with family. We talked about how we hoped we would receive answers to our questions about the Holy Ghost. We didn't have to wait long.
The second speaker on Saturday morning, Sister Durham, who was released from the General Primary Presidency the following day, gave a talk entitled, "A Child's Guiding Gift." It was a message for me. In it, she explains how, as parents, we can teach our children to recognize the Holy Ghost, how to make our homes a place of an immersion program for the language of the Spirit, and how we can help our children understand the ways that the Spirit speaks to them. She closed with this reassuring promise, "We need not fear as we see our children enter the waters of life, for we have helped them rid themselves of worldly weight. We have taught them to live for the guiding gift of the Spirit. This gift will continue to lighten the weight they carry and lead them back to their heavenly home if they live for it and follow its promptings." What encouragement!
To make sure we got the message, Elder Hales gave a talk on Sunday afternoon entitled, "The Holy Ghost." He helped explain why I have a difficult time explaining to LJ how the Holy Ghost feels. "Each of us may feel the influence of the Holy Ghost differently. His promptings will be felt in different degrees of intensity according to our individual needs and circumstances." He goes on to list some personal examples of times that the Holy Ghost had a direct influence upon his actions and how those actions effected those around him. He closes with, "To my own posterity and all within the sound of my voice, I offer my testimony of the personal revelation and constant flow of daily guidance, caution, encouragement, strength, spiritual cleansing, comfort, and peace that have come to our family through the Holy Ghost. Through the Holy Ghost, we experience “the multitude of [Christ’s] tender mercies” and miracles that do not cease."
I wanted to make sure that I took time to jot down this experience so that LJ could recall it. He is still working on being able to recognize the Holy Ghost. He's starting young so I'm sure he'll get it soon. I am grateful that through the guided talks of these leaders, we were able to get answers to our questions and I felt the love of my Heavenly Father in his answering my pleadings to know how to help my child learn more about Him. Just this evening, while driving home from work, I felt overburdened with the weight of trying to raise righteous boys. I had the Holy Ghost impress upon my mind the scriptures, "Draw near unto me, and I will draw near unto you..." and "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." I know that when we as parents strive to draw near unto the Savior that we need not fear our abilities as caretakers of the Lord's children. He will draw near unto us and will guide us and direct us in this utmost important work. I know that I can rely on the Holy Ghost to help me solidify answers to LJ's questions and grow his own testimony of the Holy Ghost.
As conference weekend arrived, we headed to Twin Falls to be with family. We talked about how we hoped we would receive answers to our questions about the Holy Ghost. We didn't have to wait long.
The second speaker on Saturday morning, Sister Durham, who was released from the General Primary Presidency the following day, gave a talk entitled, "A Child's Guiding Gift." It was a message for me. In it, she explains how, as parents, we can teach our children to recognize the Holy Ghost, how to make our homes a place of an immersion program for the language of the Spirit, and how we can help our children understand the ways that the Spirit speaks to them. She closed with this reassuring promise, "We need not fear as we see our children enter the waters of life, for we have helped them rid themselves of worldly weight. We have taught them to live for the guiding gift of the Spirit. This gift will continue to lighten the weight they carry and lead them back to their heavenly home if they live for it and follow its promptings." What encouragement!
To make sure we got the message, Elder Hales gave a talk on Sunday afternoon entitled, "The Holy Ghost." He helped explain why I have a difficult time explaining to LJ how the Holy Ghost feels. "Each of us may feel the influence of the Holy Ghost differently. His promptings will be felt in different degrees of intensity according to our individual needs and circumstances." He goes on to list some personal examples of times that the Holy Ghost had a direct influence upon his actions and how those actions effected those around him. He closes with, "To my own posterity and all within the sound of my voice, I offer my testimony of the personal revelation and constant flow of daily guidance, caution, encouragement, strength, spiritual cleansing, comfort, and peace that have come to our family through the Holy Ghost. Through the Holy Ghost, we experience “the multitude of [Christ’s] tender mercies” and miracles that do not cease."
I wanted to make sure that I took time to jot down this experience so that LJ could recall it. He is still working on being able to recognize the Holy Ghost. He's starting young so I'm sure he'll get it soon. I am grateful that through the guided talks of these leaders, we were able to get answers to our questions and I felt the love of my Heavenly Father in his answering my pleadings to know how to help my child learn more about Him. Just this evening, while driving home from work, I felt overburdened with the weight of trying to raise righteous boys. I had the Holy Ghost impress upon my mind the scriptures, "Draw near unto me, and I will draw near unto you..." and "Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." I know that when we as parents strive to draw near unto the Savior that we need not fear our abilities as caretakers of the Lord's children. He will draw near unto us and will guide us and direct us in this utmost important work. I know that I can rely on the Holy Ghost to help me solidify answers to LJ's questions and grow his own testimony of the Holy Ghost.
Thursday, June 18, 2015
Be Not Weary ... But I Am Weary!
I did it! I finally started this post. I have had notes in my scriptures for months about this and I've been thinking about it even longer. What held me back you ask? Oh...I was weary in well-doing.
This post incorporates ideas from not one but two of my "Top 5 Talks". You've got to know one of them by now. "However Long and Hard the Road" by Elder Holland and the other is "A Law of Increasing Returns" by President Eyring. I listen to both of these talks frequently and often have stories from them come to my mind.
The other day, I kept thinking about the first and how Elder Holland discusses Doctrine and Covenants 64:33-34 which includes "...be not weary in well-doing, for you are laying the foundation of a great work..." As he expands on that scripture, he states, "That 'great work' is you". There are countless times that I have felt that line being whispered in my ear. Whether I'm feeling weary or just down, I hear this little whisper of "Keep at it! That 'great work' is you!" (Along with the "Don't you quit" line from another Elder Holland talk, I think he is my personal cheerleader.) It has helped me to get through difficult times and to keep my priorities in line with the priorities of heaven.
I think one thing that is interesting is that it doesn't just say "be not weary". Thank goodness, because I wouldn't be able to follow that counsel. My life is pretty slow-paced compared to most but even with the demands I have, I definitely feel weary at times. However, adding the "in well-doing" caveat doesn't exactly make it easy.
As a mom, I've also had the idea come to my mind of, "That 'great work' is LJ", "That 'great work' is 'The Lion'". Because, really, they are the "great work" of my life.
Have you ever tried to gather kids for family prayer at the end of a long day (or even at the beginning of the day)? I'd say that is "well-doing" and oh-my-goodness it can be so easy to be weary doing that. I have a doctorate degree and am very good at taking tests, but I cannot get straight A's on the exams the boys give me. I was one of those lucky people that didn't need to study all that much and things came pretty easy. As a parent though, sheesh, I feel like I'm always 4 chapters behind and don't have any answers. But, I try and I study more of the counsel that is there and I keep trying and that is all I can do and that is enough. At times, I definitely grow weary in my parenting but I do not ever grow weary in loving them or caring about their future and their salvation.
In "A Law of Increasing Returns", President Eyring discusses short crops, (where you see the fruits of your efforts quickly), and late crops, (where it takes a long time - even a lifetime to see the results of your work). Work in the home is usually of the late crop variety. You can put in years and years of blood, sweat, tears, faith and hope but it doesn't guarantee a great harvest. I do feel that every once and a while you do get a little dividend on your investment. Frequently in the last few days, LJ has surprised us by his go-get-it attitude in helping around the house and both boys have demonstrated amazing manners (for their age) and consideration for others' feelings. It seems like they are on the right track to growing up to be good gentlemen. (Now just to keep them on the right track...)
When dealing with late crops, it is easy to become weary. Thank heavens, (literally), for those little dividends to keep us going. In October 2009, Elder Bednar gave a talk entitled, "More Diligent and Concerned at Home". (And, wow, I didn't even realize that the talk also references D&C 64:33. Maybe my random tangential thoughts do make sense!) Diligence seems like the antidote for weariness if you ask me. He states, "Each family prayer, each episode of family scripture study, and each family home evening is a brushstroke on the canvas of our souls. No one event may appear to be very impressive or memorable ... our consistency in doing seemingly small things can lead to significant spiritual results." It is those small things that matter. You know, those things that are so easy to push aside because, in times of weariness, we think, "Oh, we don't have time for that today. The boys never listen anyway. We'll just put it off til next week." I know that as we are consistent in those little things we will see the blessings, even if it is not until a future time.
Have you ever compared the effort that Adam and Eve had to put into eating from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil vs the effort it takes to get to the Tree of Life in Lehi's vision? Of course, Adam and Eve had a bit of help. Satan was all, "Hey...do you want to eat some of this fruit? Oh, let me just go get it for you. Do you need me to peel it for you? Yes, here you go, all ready to eat. Dig in!" In contrast, getting to the Tree of Life is somewhat akin to American Ninja Warrior. Here's this rod of iron to hold onto while you go along this filthy river of water, (symbolizing the depths of hell!), through a mist of darkness and get mocked by a bunch of people. I don't think I could even handle the first 2 obstacles of the American Ninja Warrior course without feeling a bit weary, much less struggle through Lehi's vision in real life. I don't like heights as it is but if the cliff face goes to a river representing hell, I may be a bit paralyzed with fear.
Living in such a way as to lead one (and one's family) to the Tree of Life definitely may cause at least thoughts of feeling weary and overwhelmed. Thankfully, we have the Holy Ghost to comfort us and strengthen us. (More on that in a future post.) We are blessed with insights and help in those times of need as long as we seek it out. As we work to not be weary we are given extra strength and an extra spiritual boost. I find that when I am being diligent in prayer and scripture study that those things become easier for me.
I know that we are up for the task at hand. I know that He who designed the task has ensured that we will succeed with his help. Be not weary in well doing. When you feel weary and too tired to pray, just pray. When you are exasperated with your kids, (do your best to) continue to lay that foundation that will help them become the "great work" of your life. My boys will be the first to tell you that I am far from perfect in this but I try and I do my best and that is enough. The same goes for you.
This post incorporates ideas from not one but two of my "Top 5 Talks". You've got to know one of them by now. "However Long and Hard the Road" by Elder Holland and the other is "A Law of Increasing Returns" by President Eyring. I listen to both of these talks frequently and often have stories from them come to my mind.
The other day, I kept thinking about the first and how Elder Holland discusses Doctrine and Covenants 64:33-34 which includes "...be not weary in well-doing, for you are laying the foundation of a great work..." As he expands on that scripture, he states, "That 'great work' is you". There are countless times that I have felt that line being whispered in my ear. Whether I'm feeling weary or just down, I hear this little whisper of "Keep at it! That 'great work' is you!" (Along with the "Don't you quit" line from another Elder Holland talk, I think he is my personal cheerleader.) It has helped me to get through difficult times and to keep my priorities in line with the priorities of heaven.
I think one thing that is interesting is that it doesn't just say "be not weary". Thank goodness, because I wouldn't be able to follow that counsel. My life is pretty slow-paced compared to most but even with the demands I have, I definitely feel weary at times. However, adding the "in well-doing" caveat doesn't exactly make it easy.
As a mom, I've also had the idea come to my mind of, "That 'great work' is LJ", "That 'great work' is 'The Lion'". Because, really, they are the "great work" of my life.
Have you ever tried to gather kids for family prayer at the end of a long day (or even at the beginning of the day)? I'd say that is "well-doing" and oh-my-goodness it can be so easy to be weary doing that. I have a doctorate degree and am very good at taking tests, but I cannot get straight A's on the exams the boys give me. I was one of those lucky people that didn't need to study all that much and things came pretty easy. As a parent though, sheesh, I feel like I'm always 4 chapters behind and don't have any answers. But, I try and I study more of the counsel that is there and I keep trying and that is all I can do and that is enough. At times, I definitely grow weary in my parenting but I do not ever grow weary in loving them or caring about their future and their salvation.
In "A Law of Increasing Returns", President Eyring discusses short crops, (where you see the fruits of your efforts quickly), and late crops, (where it takes a long time - even a lifetime to see the results of your work). Work in the home is usually of the late crop variety. You can put in years and years of blood, sweat, tears, faith and hope but it doesn't guarantee a great harvest. I do feel that every once and a while you do get a little dividend on your investment. Frequently in the last few days, LJ has surprised us by his go-get-it attitude in helping around the house and both boys have demonstrated amazing manners (for their age) and consideration for others' feelings. It seems like they are on the right track to growing up to be good gentlemen. (Now just to keep them on the right track...)
When dealing with late crops, it is easy to become weary. Thank heavens, (literally), for those little dividends to keep us going. In October 2009, Elder Bednar gave a talk entitled, "More Diligent and Concerned at Home". (And, wow, I didn't even realize that the talk also references D&C 64:33. Maybe my random tangential thoughts do make sense!) Diligence seems like the antidote for weariness if you ask me. He states, "Each family prayer, each episode of family scripture study, and each family home evening is a brushstroke on the canvas of our souls. No one event may appear to be very impressive or memorable ... our consistency in doing seemingly small things can lead to significant spiritual results." It is those small things that matter. You know, those things that are so easy to push aside because, in times of weariness, we think, "Oh, we don't have time for that today. The boys never listen anyway. We'll just put it off til next week." I know that as we are consistent in those little things we will see the blessings, even if it is not until a future time.
Have you ever compared the effort that Adam and Eve had to put into eating from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil vs the effort it takes to get to the Tree of Life in Lehi's vision? Of course, Adam and Eve had a bit of help. Satan was all, "Hey...do you want to eat some of this fruit? Oh, let me just go get it for you. Do you need me to peel it for you? Yes, here you go, all ready to eat. Dig in!" In contrast, getting to the Tree of Life is somewhat akin to American Ninja Warrior. Here's this rod of iron to hold onto while you go along this filthy river of water, (symbolizing the depths of hell!), through a mist of darkness and get mocked by a bunch of people. I don't think I could even handle the first 2 obstacles of the American Ninja Warrior course without feeling a bit weary, much less struggle through Lehi's vision in real life. I don't like heights as it is but if the cliff face goes to a river representing hell, I may be a bit paralyzed with fear.
Living in such a way as to lead one (and one's family) to the Tree of Life definitely may cause at least thoughts of feeling weary and overwhelmed. Thankfully, we have the Holy Ghost to comfort us and strengthen us. (More on that in a future post.) We are blessed with insights and help in those times of need as long as we seek it out. As we work to not be weary we are given extra strength and an extra spiritual boost. I find that when I am being diligent in prayer and scripture study that those things become easier for me.
I know that we are up for the task at hand. I know that He who designed the task has ensured that we will succeed with his help. Be not weary in well doing. When you feel weary and too tired to pray, just pray. When you are exasperated with your kids, (do your best to) continue to lay that foundation that will help them become the "great work" of your life. My boys will be the first to tell you that I am far from perfect in this but I try and I do my best and that is enough. The same goes for you.
Thursday, December 4, 2014
I'm Not Ignoring You
The Lion is sick right now. Nothing serious but he has a fever and some patches of hives. (If it is serious, and I'm oblivious, and you know better, let me know!) The itchy hives are making it tough for him to sleep. We were up quite a bit with him last night and he's been whimpering a lot tonight already. Last night, I tried to get him to sleep on the couch with me. I thought, "He's so clingy that maybe if I get him to just snuggle, he'll calm down and fall asleep." Poor guy did not stop moving! He was just rubbing his feet together, trying to scratch the hives on his ankles. I finally gave up and decided to put him back in bed, knowing that being with me wasn't helping him sleep and he would hopefully be better off in his own bed. Having learned my lesson last night, the plan for tonight is to just let him be, to let him get over it and go back to sleep on his own because my intervention only proves a distraction and doesn't help him get to sleep.
However, in his mind, I am certain, he is saying "Dudes! I don't feel good! Why is no one coming to hug me when I'm sad!? ... ... ... Hello!? Is anyone there? Does someone care about me? ... ... ... I don't feel good!"
How often have we been in a similar situation with our Heavenly Father? I imagine it a bit like trying to wave down a rescue plane.
We are struggling and having this horrible trial and we want out. We are ready to be done, or at the very least, we are ready for someone to hear of our tribulation. But no answer comes. We feel we aren't being heard.
Trust me - I hear The Lion. The reason I got up with him last night is because I have a hard time sleeping when he is sick. I'm listening with bated breath to every whimper, every cough and every cry. I wish I could just cuddle him all night and keep him safe but I know, in the current situation, that wouldn't help. I long to help him and fix everything for him. Are these not the feelings of our Heavenly Father? I am pretty certain that every prayer is heard. I am pretty certain He listens harder when we are struggling, just as I do when my kids aren't feeling well. Sometimes, however, an immediate answer or a swift rescue is not what is expedient for our benefit and the larger plan. I saw heard a quote this evening from Elder Scott in the October 1995 General Conference that says, "Your Father in Heaven and His Beloved Son love you perfectly. They would not require you to experience a moment more of difficulty than is absolutely needed [emphasis added] for your personal benefit or for that of those you love." That is definitely more generous than what I do as a parent but the point is there. I never want my children to go through difficulty or struggles unless there is a purpose behind it.
In an amazing talk called Bread or Stones: Understanding the God We Pray to, S. Michael Wilcox discusses the idea of a "fourth watch God" in regards to Mark, Chapter 6. He talks about how it is not until the 4th watch (from 3am to sunrise) is when Jesus finally came to help the apostles who, for hours, had been struggling to row against the wind. He says, "So when the trials aren't over and the blessings don't come, don't assume that He is not there, or He is not listening, or He doesn't care, or you're not worthy. Always assume you have not yet reached the fourth watch." He goes on to explain, what to do if you feel as if you are in the 9th watch. It is truly fantastic talk. Take a minute, or more like 5 minutes, to read it. I promise you will feel something that will give you hope, no matter what your trial may be. Maybe I should read it to The Lion.
In the meantime, I am going to call it a night while The Lion is quiet because he may become a fourth watch need-more-medicine-in-order-to-sleep kiddo.
One last thing, whatever your trial or your struggle may be - say a prayer to your God asking him how he feels about you. The answer with give you hope and strength to get through this next watch.
However, in his mind, I am certain, he is saying "Dudes! I don't feel good! Why is no one coming to hug me when I'm sad!? ... ... ... Hello!? Is anyone there? Does someone care about me? ... ... ... I don't feel good!"
How often have we been in a similar situation with our Heavenly Father? I imagine it a bit like trying to wave down a rescue plane.
We are struggling and having this horrible trial and we want out. We are ready to be done, or at the very least, we are ready for someone to hear of our tribulation. But no answer comes. We feel we aren't being heard.
Trust me - I hear The Lion. The reason I got up with him last night is because I have a hard time sleeping when he is sick. I'm listening with bated breath to every whimper, every cough and every cry. I wish I could just cuddle him all night and keep him safe but I know, in the current situation, that wouldn't help. I long to help him and fix everything for him. Are these not the feelings of our Heavenly Father? I am pretty certain that every prayer is heard. I am pretty certain He listens harder when we are struggling, just as I do when my kids aren't feeling well. Sometimes, however, an immediate answer or a swift rescue is not what is expedient for our benefit and the larger plan. I saw heard a quote this evening from Elder Scott in the October 1995 General Conference that says, "Your Father in Heaven and His Beloved Son love you perfectly. They would not require you to experience a moment more of difficulty than is absolutely needed [emphasis added] for your personal benefit or for that of those you love." That is definitely more generous than what I do as a parent but the point is there. I never want my children to go through difficulty or struggles unless there is a purpose behind it.
In an amazing talk called Bread or Stones: Understanding the God We Pray to, S. Michael Wilcox discusses the idea of a "fourth watch God" in regards to Mark, Chapter 6. He talks about how it is not until the 4th watch (from 3am to sunrise) is when Jesus finally came to help the apostles who, for hours, had been struggling to row against the wind. He says, "So when the trials aren't over and the blessings don't come, don't assume that He is not there, or He is not listening, or He doesn't care, or you're not worthy. Always assume you have not yet reached the fourth watch." He goes on to explain, what to do if you feel as if you are in the 9th watch. It is truly fantastic talk. Take a minute, or more like 5 minutes, to read it. I promise you will feel something that will give you hope, no matter what your trial may be. Maybe I should read it to The Lion.
In the meantime, I am going to call it a night while The Lion is quiet because he may become a fourth watch need-more-medicine-in-order-to-sleep kiddo.
One last thing, whatever your trial or your struggle may be - say a prayer to your God asking him how he feels about you. The answer with give you hope and strength to get through this next watch.
Saturday, April 26, 2014
Small & Simple Things: Part 2
One of the reasons I wanted to split this guest post into two parts was that a full talk can be a bit overwhelming to read in one sitting and it is such a good talk that I wanted to make sure the 2nd half wasn't neglected. I love Deborah's insights on the story of Mary and Martha. Like her, I at times have been a bit bugged by this story because I get defensive for Martha. (Thankfully, Martha was much more humble than I am and took the Savior's counsel as she should.) Deborah's perspective helps me to see where I can improve.
She also discusses a story of their daughter needing to be hospitalized. When The Lion was in the hospital, I remember trying to think of someone that I could talk to that would understand what I was going through in trying to be there for my hospitalized child but feeling guilty for not being with my other child. I thought of Deborah, knowing she had been through a similar situation, but felt odd calling her up out of the blue. (At the time we weren't in the same ward and hadn't really kept in contact.) Then, out of the blue, she called me. She said she had heard we needed to spend some extra time in the hospital and wanted to call to see not only how Spencer was doing but also how I was doing. We talked for awhile and she provided much needed comfort. I think the greatest comfort was that I knew that Heavenly Father had heard my quiet, little request for a friend. I am so grateful for her willingness to listen to that prompting and not feeling awkward about an "out of the blue" phone call. I honestly doubt she will ever know what it meant, (and still means), to me.
I also love the quote at the end of the talk by Sister Reeves. Here you go -
She also discusses a story of their daughter needing to be hospitalized. When The Lion was in the hospital, I remember trying to think of someone that I could talk to that would understand what I was going through in trying to be there for my hospitalized child but feeling guilty for not being with my other child. I thought of Deborah, knowing she had been through a similar situation, but felt odd calling her up out of the blue. (At the time we weren't in the same ward and hadn't really kept in contact.) Then, out of the blue, she called me. She said she had heard we needed to spend some extra time in the hospital and wanted to call to see not only how Spencer was doing but also how I was doing. We talked for awhile and she provided much needed comfort. I think the greatest comfort was that I knew that Heavenly Father had heard my quiet, little request for a friend. I am so grateful for her willingness to listen to that prompting and not feeling awkward about an "out of the blue" phone call. I honestly doubt she will ever know what it meant, (and still means), to me.
I also love the quote at the end of the talk by Sister Reeves. Here you go -
The 2nd thing I
wanted to share is:
Simplify our lives, and in
simplifying, define what matters most:
In a talk by Elder L.
Tom Perry entitled “Let Him Do It with Simplicity” he
said, “In our search to obtain relief from the stresses of life, may we
earnestly seek ways to simplify our lives.”
Right there he gave us a
key equation “simplifying our lives = stress relief”. I believe all of us could use a little stress
relief in our life.
I recently listened to
talk by Jenny Phillips where she talked about the story of Mary and
Martha. In Luke 10 it states, Now it
came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a
certain woman named Marth received him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, which
also sat at Jesus’ feet, and heard his word.
But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said,
Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her
therefore that she help me. And Jesus
answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about
many things: But one thing is needful:
and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from
her.
I never realized how much
there was to be learned from this story and, to be honest, this story used to
bug me a little bit because Martha was working so hard and Mary left her to do
all the work. If I was Martha, (and I
often am), I wouldn’t have been super happy, but as I came to understand the
real lesson Christ was trying to teach I realized the wealth of knowledge
hidden in this sweet story.
What caused Martha to be
so weighed down and troubled about many things that it caused her not to take
the time to sit at Jesus feet and be taught?
I am going to rephrase the question for us. What causes us to be so weighed down and
stressed, (and busy, might I add), that we don’t take time put the most
important things first? Think personally
about what things in your life are causing you to be Martha.
Among trials and everyday
stress how do we establish proper priorities?
Referring back to
President Uchtdorf’s talk “Of Things That Matter Most”, he taught about this
very thing. He talked about tree growth
and when seasons are ideal a tree grows at a normal rate, however, during
seasons when growing conditions are not ideal, trees slow down their growth and
devote their energy to the basic elements necessary for survival. “Therefore it is good advice to slow down a
little and steady the course and focus on the essentials when experiencing
adverse conditions.”
A few years ago, our daughter,
Kayelee, was in the hospital. She was
diagnosed with a very rare blood disorder if you want to call it that and
things were very scary. It was one of
those moments in life that I had no idea my story would be written this way. I remember at that time feeling so many
different emotions as her condition was very scary and sometimes I wasn’t sure
how many days were left. I remember
being so grateful for each and every day, so grateful for another day with her,
so grateful for each one of my children and just how precious they are. It made me realize my family and the gospel
were my number 1 priorities and it was essential I put them first in my life. I remember one particular family home evening,
she was finally able to come home from the hospital, just for a short time and
we took our family to the temple grounds. It was a Monday night so no one was there and
we just sat on the temple grounds as a family and sang primary songs. The words of families can be together forever
and I love to see the temple brought such peace and tears just flowed. I was so grateful at that moment to have my
whole family with me and I was reminded again what was most important. I will never forget that special day; it is a
memory I will cherish forever.
I remember at that time I
was reminded of what mattered most. The
difficulties we were facing forced us to slow down a bit and devote our energy
to the things that were essential.
Elder Dallin H. Oaks
taught, “We have to forego some good things in order to choose other things
that are better or best because they develop faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and
strengthen families.”
What things are most important
to you?
I think on the top of our
list should be Heavenly Father, Christ and our families. Those are personally
my greatest treasures.
How do we put those things
first in our lives? You’ll have to answer those questions yourself, personally,
but I am going to give you a couple tools:
Last week Joe and I had the
opportunity to take our older 3 kids to the Saturday morning session of
conference and during that session there was the sweetest talk given by Linda
S. Reeves in her talk she said this: “I
must testify of the blessings of daily scripture study and prayer and weekly
family home evening. These are the very practices
that help take away stress, give direction to our lives, and add protection to
our homes. Then…we can petition the Lord
for help and expect great guidance from the Spirit, knowing that we have done
what our Father has asked us to do.”
And so I want to challenge
each of you to pray daily, read your scriptures daily, and have weekly family
home evening. Just like she said these
are the very practices that help take away stress and give direction to our
lives.
I know all of us want
direction and stress relief. I know I
do. Right now Joe and I are in the
process of building a home. This has
taken so much of our time, and added a lot of stress I might add. Things don’t feel super simple right now among
all the other things we have to do… plus build a house. But, I was reminded this week that I am also
building children, and in the midst of the chaos of things that often takes our
time building children is way more important than building a home.
I am going to do my best
to make sure I am putting personal and family prayer, personal and family
scripture study and weekly family home evening as priorities and I am confident
life will be simpler and the most important things will get done each day.
Friday, April 25, 2014
Small and Simple Things: Part 1
I am very excited about this guest post! Deborah was one of my first friends when we moved to Idaho and I have been so grateful for her example to me. She is an amazing mom of 7 great kids ranging in age from 6 month to 12 years. I had her oldest son in Webelos in our old ward and I am so, so impressed with this young man. I hope our boys grow up to be just like him.
She gave this talk about simplicity in church a few weeks ago. Since the boys were miraculously well-behaved, I was able to listen and I loved many of the messages she shared. Look forward to Part 2 in the next couple of days. Here is Part 1 -
She gave this talk about simplicity in church a few weeks ago. Since the boys were miraculously well-behaved, I was able to listen and I loved many of the messages she shared. Look forward to Part 2 in the next couple of days. Here is Part 1 -
When I was a little girl,
I always wanted lots of babies. I
continued to feel that way all of my life it was a dream of mine. Now I am a mom, and I have lots of babies and I
couldn’t be happier. I love living my
dream.
With that being said,
there are parts of this role or job I had no idea even existed when I was small
or even since I have grown up. I truly
had no idea some of the things that would become part of my story. This leads me into my topic. The bishop called me and asked me to speak on
simplicity, “let him do it with simplicity”. I’ll be honest - being a mom of 7 doesn’t
often coincide with the word “simple”,
so obviously I needed the topic more than probably most of you. Bear with me as I share some of my thoughts
as I have studied this topic. I know
everyone isn’t a mom or isn’t me and doesn’t view things the way I do, but
hopefully I’ll be able to reach all of you as I speak “simply” in terms of the
gospel.
After praying and reading
a lot this week about this topic there were two things that stood out to me
when it comes to simplicity, the first being:
The gospel is simple!
Simple as that!
In Alma 37:6-7 it reads: Now ye may suppose that this is foolishness in
me; but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great
things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the
wise. And the Lord God doth work
by means to bring about his great and eternal purposes; and by very small means
the Lord doth confound the wise and bringeth about the salvation of many souls.
The Lord uses small and
simple things to confound the wise. Often,
I think as members of the church, we try and complicate things. The Lord used a very humble and unlearned boy
to restore his gospel on the earth today. I think probably because he knew he would
listen.
When I see people question
things about the gospel it is often because they are way over thinking things
and looking for answers to questions in unreliable sources because it just
can’t be that simple. I really feel like
it is that simple; God put it in simple terms so that even the child could
understand and gain a testimony. If it’s
not that simple to you, then maybe you are over thinking things.
In a talk by president
Uchtdorf entitled “Of Things that Matter Most”, he shares the following story:
There is a beauty and clarity that comes from
simplicity that we sometimes do not appreciate in our thirst for intricate
solutions. For example, it wasn’t long
after astronauts and cosmonauts orbited the earth that they realized ballpoint
pens would not work in space. And so some very smart people went to work
solving the problem. It took thousands of hours and millions of dollars, but in
the end, they developed a pen that could write anywhere, in any temperature,
and on nearly any surface. But how did the astronauts and cosmonauts get along
until the problem was solved? They simply used a pencil.
The story is told that the legendary football coach
Vince Lombardi had a ritual he performed on the first day of training. He would
hold up a football, show it to the athletes who had been playing the sport for
many years, and say, “Gentlemen, … this is
a football!” He talked about its size and shape, how it can be kicked, carried,
or passed. He took the team out onto the empty field and said, “This is a
football field.” He walked them around, describing the dimensions, the shape,
the rules, and how the game is played.
This coach knew that even these experienced players,
and indeed the team, could become great only by mastering the fundamentals.
They could spend their time practicing intricate trick plays, but until they
mastered the fundamentals of the game, they would never become a championship
team.
I think most of us intuitively understand how
important the fundamentals are. It is just that we sometimes get distracted by
so many things that seem more enticing. Printed
material, wide-ranging media sources, electronic tools and gadgets—all helpful
if used properly—can become hurtful diversions or heartless chambers of
isolation.
Yet amidst the multitude of voices and choices, the
humble Man of Galilee stands with hands outstretched, waiting. His is a simple
message: “Come, follow me.” And He does not speak with a
powerful megaphone but with a still, small voice. It is so easy for the basic
gospel message to get lost amidst the deluge of information that hits us from
all sides.
The holy scriptures and the spoken word of the living
prophets give emphasis to the fundamental principles and doctrines of the
gospel. The reason we return to these foundational principles, to the pure
doctrines, is because they are the gateway to truths of profound meaning. They
are the door to experiences of sublime importance that would otherwise be
beyond our capacity to comprehend. These simple, basic principles are the key
to living in harmony with God and man. They are the keys to opening the windows
of heaven. They lead us to the peace, joy, and understanding that Heavenly
Father has promised to His children who hear and obey Him.
I have a friend who
recently left the church. As I saw the process unfold, it saddened me so much. I truly believe had she focused on the small
and simple things she would have never ended up where she is at. I challenged her before she completely left the
church to read her scriptures and pray daily for a month to see what that would
do for her since at the time she wasn’t really doing those key things. She wouldn’t do it. All she had learned in her 30+ years of life
about the gospel and she wouldn’t take the time to simply read and pray.
Focus on the small and
simple things of the gospel, and, again, remember Alma 37:6-7.
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
The Time to Learn Is Now
One of the speakers at church reminded me of one of my teachers in graduate school. He taught part of our pharmacokinetics class. For those that don't know, pharmacokinetics is mixture of pharmacology, physics, calculus and physiology. It was tough stuff! During lecture, I had the thought, "This is too complicated to try to focus on right now. I'll just figure it out later at home." But then, this teacher made us repeat the phrase, "The time to learn is now!" We broke up into our assigned study groups and worked through a boatload of practice problems until we had a clear understanding of the concepts.
In regards to the gospel, "the time to learn is now". The time to (try) to understand Isaiah is now. The time to connect parables is now. I am not good at this. I get caught up in deadlines. "I have to finish this chapter this morning so I'll just make a note of what I want to learn at a later time." (If anyone has tips on how to overcome this, please share.) I think part of my struggle is that the "aha moments" don't come easily or frequently. In the 1982 April Conference talk True Greatness by Howard W. Hunter, he states, "True greatness is never a result of a chance occurrence or a one-time effort or achievement. It requires the development of character. It requires a multitude of correct decisions for the everyday choices between good and evil that Elder Boyd K. Packer spoke about when he said, "Over the years these little choices will be bundled together and show clearly what we value." (Ensign, Nov. 1980, p. 21) Those choices will also show clearly what we are." It is the small, everyday decisions and study that help us to gain greater over all knowledge. If you would like to learn more about this idea, I would urge you to listen to the talk "A Law of Increasing Returns" by Elder Eyring. It is in my "Top 5 Talks that Continue to Change My Life".
Remember how I said I wanted to be a Janet Rowley type of scriptorian? Frequently, when I have a lazy scripture study I will think, "WWSRD - What would Sister Rowley do? Sister Rowley would figure it out. She would investigate it." I need to do better in this area. I am grateful for the examples I have around me to help me learn how.
(For the record, I do not remember many details of pharmacokinetics. However, I do know some great websites that will let me type in all the information and spit out an answer.)
In regards to the gospel, "the time to learn is now". The time to (try) to understand Isaiah is now. The time to connect parables is now. I am not good at this. I get caught up in deadlines. "I have to finish this chapter this morning so I'll just make a note of what I want to learn at a later time." (If anyone has tips on how to overcome this, please share.) I think part of my struggle is that the "aha moments" don't come easily or frequently. In the 1982 April Conference talk True Greatness by Howard W. Hunter, he states, "True greatness is never a result of a chance occurrence or a one-time effort or achievement. It requires the development of character. It requires a multitude of correct decisions for the everyday choices between good and evil that Elder Boyd K. Packer spoke about when he said, "Over the years these little choices will be bundled together and show clearly what we value." (Ensign, Nov. 1980, p. 21) Those choices will also show clearly what we are." It is the small, everyday decisions and study that help us to gain greater over all knowledge. If you would like to learn more about this idea, I would urge you to listen to the talk "A Law of Increasing Returns" by Elder Eyring. It is in my "Top 5 Talks that Continue to Change My Life".
Remember how I said I wanted to be a Janet Rowley type of scriptorian? Frequently, when I have a lazy scripture study I will think, "WWSRD - What would Sister Rowley do? Sister Rowley would figure it out. She would investigate it." I need to do better in this area. I am grateful for the examples I have around me to help me learn how.
(For the record, I do not remember many details of pharmacokinetics. However, I do know some great websites that will let me type in all the information and spit out an answer.)
Thursday, October 10, 2013
My Conversion, Part 4: Trip to Salt Lake and Baptism Service
Right when I got there, we went over to Temple Square and saw the Testaments
movie. Afterwards, we called one of
Lars’ friends, Drake, (remember this story?) to learn the plan for General Conference the upcoming
Saturday. We found out that we definitely
had tickets to the afternoon session and Lars had tickets for the Priesthood
session.
The next day, we went to Park City
The next day was General Conference. We had breakfast at one of Lars’ friend’s
homes with a bunch of people and watched the morning session. Then we got ready to head over to Salt Lake
During the Priesthood session, I met up with Kim and some of the people I met at my baptism. Later, Lars came up and we all climbed Ensign Peak and got a great look at the city. The next day, we watched the conference sessions on TV and later went back over to Salt Lake to have dinner at Drake's mom's house. I have never felt more like I was where I needed to be than I did that night. It was purely amazing. The spirit was there in abundance as we talked about their testimonies of eternal families.
The next day, we wandered around Temple Square. We watched the videos of the church commercials for at least 10 minutes, reminding each other of the ones we remembered from when we were kids. We sat and talked for a long time at the airport before I went through security. I think we both felt a connection in regards to what it would feel like to go home. I knew that I had no one back there that would be excited to hear about my trip and so Lars was one of the few people I was able to share that excitement.
That ability to relate to one another has continued on and on throughout the years. We've discussed how our family and friends who are not members don't quite get it when we say, "I feel an impression that I should..." or "I read my patriarchal blessing and have decided I should..." Lars is the only member of the church that knew me before I was a member of the church. That has proven to be an important aspect of our friendship.
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones...
LJ and I have really, (really!) been struggling lately. I started working a couple of months ago. It is "only part-time" but I am still gone over 30 hours a week and miss dinner and bedtime at least 4 nights each week. It seems like it has recently dawned on him that it is not a temporary thing and that this is the new normal. This has led to a lot of negative attention-seeking. As I have striven to keep my cool while having my buttons pushed (again and again and again), I have learned that the most difficult thing to keep in check is my tongue. My response has frequently been to (literally) bite my tongue.
My childhood was less than ideal. Physical abuse was not a concern but I have since come to terms that there was emotional and verbal abuse. Gratefully, it was not from my parents but it was from adults in my life. It is disconcerting the vividness of my memory, both visual and audible, in regards to such things. As an example, I was probably about 10 when one of the adults in our house turned on the hose, not realizing that I was in the shower. The shower water became very hot. I jumped out of the shower, got dressed and went to find out what happened. I am certain that my 10 year old self was not considerate when I explained to the person that I had been in the shower and the water got very hot when they turned on the hose. In response, the adult hissed, "I wish it would have scalded you, you little (punk)!" I think I am still a work in progress when it comes to forgiving that person for that, as well as other exchanges. They have apologized and frequently told me what an amazing person I have become. However, even when I am able to completely forgive them, I will not be able to forget the feeling of utter disdain that was conveyed through their words.
My childhood was less than ideal. Physical abuse was not a concern but I have since come to terms that there was emotional and verbal abuse. Gratefully, it was not from my parents but it was from adults in my life. It is disconcerting the vividness of my memory, both visual and audible, in regards to such things. As an example, I was probably about 10 when one of the adults in our house turned on the hose, not realizing that I was in the shower. The shower water became very hot. I jumped out of the shower, got dressed and went to find out what happened. I am certain that my 10 year old self was not considerate when I explained to the person that I had been in the shower and the water got very hot when they turned on the hose. In response, the adult hissed, "I wish it would have scalded you, you little (punk)!" I think I am still a work in progress when it comes to forgiving that person for that, as well as other exchanges. They have apologized and frequently told me what an amazing person I have become. However, even when I am able to completely forgive them, I will not be able to forget the feeling of utter disdain that was conveyed through their words.
In April of 2007, Elder Holland gave wise counsel in this regard. He stated, "We must be so careful in speaking to a child. What we say or don't say, how we say it and when is so very, very important in shaping a child's view of himself or herself. But it is even more important in shaping that child's faith in us and theif faith in God. Be constructive in your comments to a child - always. Never tell them, even in whimsy, that they are fat or dumb or lazy or homely. You would never do it maliciously, but they remember and may struggle for years trying to forget - and to forgive." For the entire address, see here.
I hope and pray that I can do a bit better at not only avoiding hurtful words but also at utilizing positive words and constructive assessments. And, let's be honest, I also hope and pray that this phase will pass quickly. (You know, so we can move on to something even more challenging.)
Thursday, August 22, 2013
What I Believe of My Children
I saw a quote by Lady Bird Johnson today on the Positive Parenting Solutions facebook page. It stated, "Children are apt to live up to what you believe of them." It got me thinking about our boys and who they really are. I am grateful for the Plan of Salvation and how it makes it so apparent just who these kids are. As Elder Nelson has stated, "We are Children of God. Our potential is unlimited."
Back in March 2011, I wrote the following to LJ in his journal.
I bought a book the other day called "Bedtime and Naptime" by Hilary Weeks. I think I've mentioned every part of that book to your dad within the few short days I've had it. There was one particular thought that stuck with me. It came from this quote, "Once in a while, before I retire to bed, I quietly slip into my daughters' rooms, where they are fast asleep. I tuck their hair behind their ears, lean over, and softly whisper...I believe in you." Well, I don't dare sneak into your room while you are asleep for fear of waking you but I do believe in you. Since reading that, I've said that to you a few times during our little quiet moments together. However, I figure you may not remember, so I thought I would put it here as well. I do believe in you, my wonderful son(s). I believe you can (and will) do great things in your life. I believe you will be a force for good in the world and will be a positive influence as you move through this life. The other day, you gripped your little hand around my thumb and I started to think about your hands. What will your hands do during this life? How will you use them? They will certainly bless the lives of others. They will make covenants and promises. They will help and heal and teach. I love to think of your potential and, more importantly, the Lord's divine and eternal potential for you. He loves you even more than I do and has even a better view of where all you will go and what all you will do during your time here.
I know that I am lucky to have these two amazing little boys in my life and I am grateful for all the potential for good that I see in them.
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Back in March 2011, I wrote the following to LJ in his journal.
I bought a book the other day called "Bedtime and Naptime" by Hilary Weeks. I think I've mentioned every part of that book to your dad within the few short days I've had it. There was one particular thought that stuck with me. It came from this quote, "Once in a while, before I retire to bed, I quietly slip into my daughters' rooms, where they are fast asleep. I tuck their hair behind their ears, lean over, and softly whisper...I believe in you." Well, I don't dare sneak into your room while you are asleep for fear of waking you but I do believe in you. Since reading that, I've said that to you a few times during our little quiet moments together. However, I figure you may not remember, so I thought I would put it here as well. I do believe in you, my wonderful son(s). I believe you can (and will) do great things in your life. I believe you will be a force for good in the world and will be a positive influence as you move through this life. The other day, you gripped your little hand around my thumb and I started to think about your hands. What will your hands do during this life? How will you use them? They will certainly bless the lives of others. They will make covenants and promises. They will help and heal and teach. I love to think of your potential and, more importantly, the Lord's divine and eternal potential for you. He loves you even more than I do and has even a better view of where all you will go and what all you will do during your time here.
I know that I am lucky to have these two amazing little boys in my life and I am grateful for all the potential for good that I see in them.
Monday, August 5, 2013
Paying It Forward
A couple of weeks ago in Relief Society, we were discussing the talk "For Peace at Home" by Elder Scott from the April 2013 General Conference. He states, "Do all you can to have [a Christ-centered] home. Reach out to those living in adverse circumstances...Welcome into your home others who need to be strengthened by such an experience."
When I was growing up, I had a friend, Melissa, whose home always exuded a feeling of peace. It always felt nice to be there. I spent many days (and nights) there during high school. It really struck me that Melissa's mom would always come to the bedroom door before bed and say, "I love you girls. God bless you. Sleep tight." They slept with their bedroom doors open which was much different than at home where my room was directly off the kitchen so I always had my door closed. It seemed there was something symbolic about Melissa's close-knit family and their "open-door policy".
One of the sisters in Relief Society talked of how her mom always knew her friends favorite treats and snacks and would be sure to have them stocked up at their home so her friends would feel welcome there. I remember my mom buying 7 jars of pickles and taping the letters of "Melissa" on them. Melissa loved pickles so much that it became somewhat of a nickname for her. (No one in my house ate pickles but my mom bought them anyway.)
Someday, I hope to invite others into my home in a similar way with an open-door policy and jars and jars of pickles. On second thought, maybe I should tell the boys to only be friends with people who list rice-krispie treats or diet-killer cookies as their number one treat or snack.
When I was growing up, I had a friend, Melissa, whose home always exuded a feeling of peace. It always felt nice to be there. I spent many days (and nights) there during high school. It really struck me that Melissa's mom would always come to the bedroom door before bed and say, "I love you girls. God bless you. Sleep tight." They slept with their bedroom doors open which was much different than at home where my room was directly off the kitchen so I always had my door closed. It seemed there was something symbolic about Melissa's close-knit family and their "open-door policy".
One of the sisters in Relief Society talked of how her mom always knew her friends favorite treats and snacks and would be sure to have them stocked up at their home so her friends would feel welcome there. I remember my mom buying 7 jars of pickles and taping the letters of "Melissa" on them. Melissa loved pickles so much that it became somewhat of a nickname for her. (No one in my house ate pickles but my mom bought them anyway.)
Someday, I hope to invite others into my home in a similar way with an open-door policy and jars and jars of pickles. On second thought, maybe I should tell the boys to only be friends with people who list rice-krispie treats or diet-killer cookies as their number one treat or snack.
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Before the Moment of Crisis
A couple of weeks ago, we were watching a church worship service on BYUtv. One of the speakers talked about being sure not to make decisions in a moment of crisis. It is a lot more difficult to decide what to do when there are stresses and pressures upon you. This can be taken from a lot of different angles. For example, choosing that you will not try smoking before you are offered a cigarette, or even, having an escape plan in case of a fire in your home.
The idea of having premeditated decisions and plans in place, reminded me of a lesson my friend Lisa gave while we were serving together in Young Women. In it, she included a quote from Sister Elaine Dalton's April 2011 General Conference address entitled "Guardians of Virtue". It stated, "What can each of you do to be a guardian of virtue? It starts with believing you can make a difference. It starts with making a commitment. When I was a young woman, I learned that some decisions need to be made only once. I wrote my list of things I would always do and things I would never do in a small tablet. It included things like obeying the Word of Wisdom, praying daily, paying my tithing, and committing to never miss church. I made those decisions once, and then in the moment of decision, I knew exactly what to do because I had decided beforehand. When my high school friends said, 'Just one drink won't hurt,' I laughed and said, 'I decided when I was 12 not to do that.'"
Having not grown up in the church, I didn't have much guidance in the way of such things. Thankfully, for the most part, I stuck to what I would have written on my always/never lists. I believe there was definitely some divine intervention involved to help keep me on a path that would make it easy to join the church when the time came, with no addictions or other problems to overcome. That being said, it would have been much easier to navigate the waters of my teenage years and college years, if I had made such a list as this.
I am grateful for the inspired words of church leaders to ease our burdens and help us along the path. I am grateful for Lisa and her amazing lesson(s) that left such a strong impression that I remembered them months later. I am grateful for the Holy Ghost and its ability to help me recall such lessons and promptings.
The idea of having premeditated decisions and plans in place, reminded me of a lesson my friend Lisa gave while we were serving together in Young Women. In it, she included a quote from Sister Elaine Dalton's April 2011 General Conference address entitled "Guardians of Virtue". It stated, "What can each of you do to be a guardian of virtue? It starts with believing you can make a difference. It starts with making a commitment. When I was a young woman, I learned that some decisions need to be made only once. I wrote my list of things I would always do and things I would never do in a small tablet. It included things like obeying the Word of Wisdom, praying daily, paying my tithing, and committing to never miss church. I made those decisions once, and then in the moment of decision, I knew exactly what to do because I had decided beforehand. When my high school friends said, 'Just one drink won't hurt,' I laughed and said, 'I decided when I was 12 not to do that.'"
Having not grown up in the church, I didn't have much guidance in the way of such things. Thankfully, for the most part, I stuck to what I would have written on my always/never lists. I believe there was definitely some divine intervention involved to help keep me on a path that would make it easy to join the church when the time came, with no addictions or other problems to overcome. That being said, it would have been much easier to navigate the waters of my teenage years and college years, if I had made such a list as this.
I am grateful for the inspired words of church leaders to ease our burdens and help us along the path. I am grateful for Lisa and her amazing lesson(s) that left such a strong impression that I remembered them months later. I am grateful for the Holy Ghost and its ability to help me recall such lessons and promptings.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
"Studying Conference Talks Together"
From the April 2013, Ensign, p. 8.
One of my ulterior motives for starting this blog was to motivate me to really study the Ensign magazine as it came. Now that it is May 21st, I finally finished reading the April edition. (Not because I scrutinized each word but because I wasn't very diligent in reading.) I want to mark up the magazine and go back once finished to share some thoughts about things I've learned. I thought of just doing one big blog post for each full magazine but that may get a bit time consuming.
I really liked this idea of studying the conference talks together as a family. The article explains how this family buys a copy of the Ensign with conference talks for each family member and then they have an assigned talk to study each week and then share their thoughts at FHE. I think it would be a great way to really hear each other's insights rather than just reading through the talks to get through them.
I used to have the assignment to teach the RS lesson from the conference talks and I loved it because I learned so much more than I did when I just read the talks (or if I didn't even read them but just heard them at conference). I'd had the idea of preparing a talk on each one just as a study tool but I have yet to be that motivated.
I hope that, when the boys are a little older, we will be able to incorporate this manner of study into our family activities. For now, I'll be happy with this -
One of my ulterior motives for starting this blog was to motivate me to really study the Ensign magazine as it came. Now that it is May 21st, I finally finished reading the April edition. (Not because I scrutinized each word but because I wasn't very diligent in reading.) I want to mark up the magazine and go back once finished to share some thoughts about things I've learned. I thought of just doing one big blog post for each full magazine but that may get a bit time consuming.
I really liked this idea of studying the conference talks together as a family. The article explains how this family buys a copy of the Ensign with conference talks for each family member and then they have an assigned talk to study each week and then share their thoughts at FHE. I think it would be a great way to really hear each other's insights rather than just reading through the talks to get through them.
I used to have the assignment to teach the RS lesson from the conference talks and I loved it because I learned so much more than I did when I just read the talks (or if I didn't even read them but just heard them at conference). I'd had the idea of preparing a talk on each one just as a study tool but I have yet to be that motivated.
I hope that, when the boys are a little older, we will be able to incorporate this manner of study into our family activities. For now, I'll be happy with this -
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
The Magnificent Influence of a Grandma
I came across "Are You the Woman I Think You Are?" by Sheri Dew at the October 1997 General Conference somewhat randomly. (If you want the whole talk, it can be found here.) I'd been searching for a spot where Sister Dew talked about her relationship with her grandmother. In this episode of Mormon Conversations, she talks about how a grandmother has the opportunity to form a special bond with her grandchildren that sometimes a mother can't even do. I'd been thinking about that a bit the last few weeks and then, last Sunday at church with Grandma and Grandpa, LJ just wanted to sit in Grandma's lap and he made it very well known to everyone around. He went over and quietly sat in her lap. (For reference, he does not sit in my lap unless he has a 103 degree fever.) Eventually, he fell asleep there and just looked so peaceful. Later that evening, he was upset and struggling to go to sleep. Grandma went down and laid down with him which calmed him down and helped him finally go to sleep. I think that LJ and Grandma will have a special (and important) relationship. I am grateful for such a great mother-in-law who I know will be such a force for good in the lives of my young boys.
This talk by Sheri Dew describes an experience that demonstrates just the importance of those interactions between grandmother and grandchild.
I’ll never forget an interchange she and I had one night as we drove home from yet another meeting. It began when I blurted out a question that flashed through my eight-year-old mind: “Grandma, what if the gospel isn’t true and we’ve been going to all of these meetings for nothing?” Charming little eight-year-old, wasn’t I? “Sheri, you don’t need to worry about that,” she answered, “because I know that the gospel is true.”
I challenged her: “How can you know for sure?”
Several seconds passed before she said slowly, “I know for sure that the gospel is true because the Holy Ghost has told me that Jesus Christ is our Savior and that this is His Church.” She paused and then she added something I will never forget: “And, Sheri, He’ll tell you too, and when He does, your life can never be the same again.”
I still vividly remember what happened next. A sensation unlike any I had ever experienced charged through my body, and then I began to cry. Though I didn’t understand the reason for my outburst, I’m sure Grandma realized exactly what was happening—that the Spirit was bearing witness to me that what she had said was true.
As I got further into the talk, I discovered other messages that touched me in regards to "coming unto Christ".
As we increase our interaction with Him, we learn for ourselves that He will never betray us, never turn away, never change His criteria for coming unto Him. His attention is riveted on us, His brothers and sisters.
There are many ways to draw near, seek, ask, and knock. If, for example, your prayers offered to Heavenly Father in the name of Christ have become a little casual, would you recommit yourself to meaningful prayer, offered in unrushed solitude and with a repentant heart? If you have not yet come to appreciate the peace and the power of temple worship, would you partake of the ordinances of the house of the Lord as often as your circumstances allow? If you have not yet found that immersion in the scriptures increases your sensitivity to the Spirit, would you consider incorporating the word of God into your life more consistently? Tonight would be a wonderful time to begin.
It is both a blessing and a curse that it lies squarely on our own shoulders. A blessing because we know that the endpoint is always there - unyielding and unchanging but a curse in that it is our job (and not necessarily an easy one at that), to ask, seek and knock. However, I believe it is in doing those things that will help us to learn more about our own weaknesses and strengths that will lead to the permanent changes in our lives.
This is a day when the adversary has launched an all-out attack against womanhood, because he knows—he absolutely knows—that the influence of a righteous woman is enormous and that it spans generations. He would have us be disinterested in marriage and motherhood, confused by the world’s view of men and women, too harried by the pace of life to really live the gospel and to let it penetrate our souls. At all costs, he wants to keep us at arm’s length from Jesus Christ.
It is very easy to get caught up in all of those positions of attack. It is difficult to prioritize the time to ponder and think about spiritual things. That is one of the reasons I wanted to start this blog. Just for a sounding board for my thoughts. Also, a way to record ideas that come to mind while reading or listening to so many wonderful talks. Frequently, I listen or read and do not change. I am hoping that this blog will at least help me to let the lessons soak deep into my soul and maybe, just maybe, lead to some action.
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